Uhh...how did i got reminded about this disastrous cocktail of messiness? I do remember getting quite excited about this movie and then getting slapped in the crotch by it at the end of the movie but what i don't remember is why did i get excited at all?
The original Alien vs Predator isn't actually a masterpiece or a good movie in any sense. It is poorly written, the movie logic is like studying quantum physic theories from a scientist who just consume an LSD, and above all it was directed by the damned Paul W.S Anderson, the guy who directed the awful Resident Evil series. To be fair, i think the first Alien vs Predator movie is rather fun if you switch your brain off, bang your head against the brick wall for 5 minutes, and finally drink 2 bottles of tequila. I think the slight of fun that i feel is what kinda makes me expect something good that didn't actually exist in the first place when i got excited for it's sequel. Despite of it slight fun, i don't see why people want to see more of it after such low receptions both from critics and fans. Even the studio who wants some cash grab should realize that there is no more potential left for this series but oh, money talks and studio listen so we got Alien vs Predator Requiem.
I think the starting concept of this sequel was just based in the fact that the first Alien vs Predator is a Pg13 movie, meaning that there is no gore, swears or anything related to the facts that both Alien and Predators is well known for it's R rated rating. People complaining that they want to see gore when the predators do their classic Sub-zero fatality impersonation or when the aliens do their metaphorical rape killing stuffs and in that regards they did listen to the fans. So "R rated movie it is" said the studio but they forgot that you cant make a movie based just on gore and blood. You need interesting characters, good plot that drive the actions and a good direction from the director. They failed so hard in this 3 parts.
AVPR, as the marketing department of this movie like to be referred to, is following the events of Alien vs. Predator, a Predator spaceship is leaving Earth carrying dead Aliens, living facehuggers, and the body of the Predator that defeated the Alien queen. A chestburster erupts from the dead Predator's body; it is a new creature that is a hybrid of Alien and Predator characteristics called the Predalien (who the hell is in charge naming this thing?) It quickly matures into an adult and begins killing Predators throughout the ship. A Predator's weapons fire punctures the hull and the ship crashes in the forest outside of Gunnison, Colorado.
With the Predators dead, the Predalien and several facehuggers escape, implanting embryos into a nearby father and son and into several homeless people living in the sewers. A distress signal from the wrecked ship reaches the Predator home world and a lone Predator responds, traveling to Earth to observe the cause of the crash and track the facehuggers. It begins to erase the evidence of the Aliens' presence by destroying the crashed ship and using a blue liquid to dissolve the bodies of the facehuggers and their victims. That Predator have to kill all the remaining alien without leaving any traces of evidence behind while a bunch of cannon fodder is killed in gruesome ways, both by the Predator and the Aliens.
AVPR is directed by the Strauss brothers who directed...nothing before. They were just a special effect supervisor before they made this movie and the lack of experiences are spot on in the movie. AVPR is nothing but unnecessary blood and gore and its terrible in that too. When someone is dead i don't feel anything that a normal human should feel when others human died. No remorse, no sympathy, no excitement, no emotion, only apathy and that is clearly a sign that there is something wrong either with me or the movie. The writing didn't help the audience to care about the characters because they are even worse than the characters in typical slasher movies. At least in the slasher movie i want the character to die because they are written to be hated but in this movie i don't actually care at all about the characters. They are more unforgettable than a breeze of wind in my butt.
The movies try to take a more dark route with gore and blood but they took it one step farther to make darker. The lighting in this movie is so bad that i can't tell if the Aliens and the Predator is fighting or having some interspecies sex scene because the movie is way too dark to see. I know that they want this movie to be darker than it's predecessor but they don't need to go dark with the lighting too. What's the point in having a fight scenes that the audience cant see? Let the fight scene left for interpretation?
Subtle.
Speaking of action scenes, the action scenes feels rather clunky because they went back with people in rubber suit and not animatronic anymore. It almost like watching a terrible Power Ranger episode that directed by Eli Roth. I also have to say, the Predalien looks rather silly and it is the thing that we, the audiences, need to feel scared and intimidated with?
When facehugger meets Jamaican...
I do heard of some reviewer said that AVPR is a good movie is you took it as a B movie rather than a triple A movie but i think that's the exact problem of this movie. Both the original Alien and Predator is legendary because of their achievement for turning on a B movie premise into a very influential classic that leaves an impact on everyone who watch its. Yet, this movie fell into a forgettable B movie feels which the original movie try so hard not to be at the first place, ironically.
It is a good thing that this franchise is dead. After such a failure nobody will dare to touch this movie premise ever again. If you think twice about Alien Vs Predator premise, maybe this premise shouldn't be touched for a movie in the first place. They might be a good enough promise in comics and video games but for a box office movie its rather hard to execute. Both of the creatures might came from outer space and both of them leaves a trail of blood, intestines and brain matters wherever they went but that is the only thing they share in common. The alien is a beast who lives only to kill and procreate while predator is a civilized hunter who hunts for sports in Sunday morning. Their nature isn't all that compatible to make an engaging story and so far the best story they can milk out is the predators is breeding the aliens so they can used its as a hunting ritual while the human characters is just there as a chewing toy for them. As i said before, a good movie needs a good character and Alien vs Predator is having a hard time making a significantly good characters because they treat human characters as dispensable cardboard cutout. It is a franchise that is better left for comics and video game only.
Initial El Judgement
3.5
Free hugs from facehugger
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